How do YOU know you’re not Mormon?

This post is based on an article in a Norwegian newspaper about the Mormon church having baptised Norwegian celebrities after (sometimes very long after) they’ve died, certainly without them knowing, and without as much as a memo to, or any form of consent from, anyone who might have a right to speak for them.

This blog post is in both Norwegian (first) and English (after).

Oh, and it’s written partly in Satirical too, so giggles are allowed🙂

Hvordan vet DU at du ikke er mormoner?

Kilder: www.dagbladet.no, www.bt.no


Jeg bør jaggu passe meg godt for å bli altfor berømt, ellers kunne jeg jo risikere å bli døpt etter at jeg dauer, og som ateist hadde det vært en smule flaut. Men er det ikke minstekrav ved en dåp at den som døpes faktisk er fysisk tilstede, i live, ved sine fulle fem, og har samtykket? Tydeligvis ikke. «Hvis du ikke er villig til å la deg frelse mens du lever, benytter vi sjansen når du er dau og ikke lenger kan protestere. Og for at ikke noen av dine levende slektninger skal få mulighet til å protestere på dine vegne gidder vi ikke si fra til dem heller.» Og de har visst fullmakt fra øverstkommanderende Gud himsjøl, så da kan de jo gjøre hva pokker de vil.

Hvilket får meg til å lure på når de tar skrittet videre til å døpe levende folk uten at de vet om det selv. Har de først fått lov av Gud til å døpe in absentia (det er visst latin eller noe for “uten at de er tilstede”), skal du ikke se bort fra at vi plutselig ender opp som mormonere hele hurven.

How do YOU know you’re not Mormon?

Sources: www.dagbladet.no, www.bt.no (Norwegian)
Translated sources: www.dagbladet.no, www.bt.no (English)
(Translations are by Google Translate, and may contain some inaccuracies.)

I better be careful not to get too famous, or I’d run the risk of being baptised after I kick the bucket, and as an Atheist I’d find that slightly embarrassing. But isn’t the minimum requirement for baptism that the person being baptised is both physically present, alive, reasonably sane and has consented? Apparently not. «If you aren’t willing to be saved while you live, we’ll grab the opportunity when you’ve snuffed it and can’t protest. And just so that none of your living relatives shall be able to protest on your behalf, we won’t bother telling them either.» And they would appear to have been authorized by Supreme Commander God himself, so that means they can do whatever they damn well please.

Which makes me wonder when they will take the next step and start baptising living people without letting them know. Once they have God’s authorization to baptise in absentia (that’s Latin or something for someone “not present”), there’s the likelihood that we’ll suddenly end up as Mormons, the lot of us.

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